Metalcatto
The Biscuit Merchant is back, and if the artwork is telling us anything, they’re now the cookie dealer. If you owe them money, you end up like that. I knew it was only a matter of time before the kids would come back and try to break my legs. So, one of the revelations of 2025 wants to try again. Let’s see if Golden Age is an honorable sequel or just forgotten cookie dough.
Well, Golden Age is here to show us that this is a chameleon project. You never know what the dealer’s next move is going to be. One moment it’s Death/Black, the next it’s pure Prog. It’s hard to believe this is the same project that dropped some high-tier Prog Death last year. It’s still just as audacious and creative. There’s nothing to fear in the chunky riffs department. Golden Age could have been named Golden Riff and still been a blast from start to finish. The ideas don’t just flow—they collide in ways that shouldn’t work but somehow do.
Even with the crazy flow of ideas here, and even after the truly heavy moments, the album remains playful and fun in nature. There’s a lightness to the delivery that keeps things from becoming too self-serious. Also, what’s that guitar tone? It sounds like when I was a teen and tried to play an eight-string—emphasis on tried. It’s kind of comforting how dry and sharp it feels, like a tool that’s been used so much it’s become an extension of the body. There are subtle nostalgia nuggets buried in Golden Age, but they don’t make me want to cover my face in embarrassment. That’s a win.
I should now say what I didn’t like about Golden Age. Well, if I’m being really nitpicky, the ninth track could just be blended into the tenth. It’s a pretty random interlude that disrupts momentum without adding much. On a more general note, I do think the dealer could benefit from more brutal drumming. The rest of the instruments are face-melting, and the drums are solid, but it stands out to me how everything else steals the show. It’s a minor detail, really. I hope the Scout’s Union doesn’t beat me up now for speaking my mind.
Golden Age shows that the man behind this project isn’t running out of ideas yet. If anything, we should find whatever basement he’s working in and camp outside until he makes more. You know my motto: I want my artists rich, but also—if they stay broke and miserable, they give us better work. It’s a contradiction I live with. Anyway, for those of you who love thick riffs and never knowing what’s coming next, The Biscuit Merchant is the band to follow. The cookie dealer is back in business.
Label: Independent (where’s a label when you need it?)
Release date: May 8th, 2026
Website: https://thebiscuitmerchant.bandcamp.com/
Country: USA
Score: 4.0/5.0 (I need to stop giving fours!)
Metal Eclipse Reviews 