Suffering so you don't have to!
Metalcatto
Sludge Metal sometimes doesn’t even feel like Metal. Maybe it’s because the fanbase seems so far removed from the usual extreme lore that I often forget these releases even exist. However, Ghold looked like a band that deserved some attention, and with a title like Bludgeoning Simulations, I was left wondering if it was going to be ultra-violent or just a parody of the normal beatdown our ears get at MER Industries. There was only one way to find out — by clicking that shady link!
Vicky
If you listen to Black Metal, you might want to read this article. If not, then these following lines might confuse you at least a tiny bit. We know English Black Metal, don’t we? Starting with Venom, continuing with some infamous bands that I might not mention in this article – that, by the way wants to be somewhat decent, and mentioning groups with bizarre names doesn’t exactly help too much –, and finally ending with Cradle of Filth, the Brits definitely have what it takes to make us feel whatever Black Metal is supposed to make people feel (do they all want to make us dance or am I just thinking of CoF’s collab with Ed Sheeran?).
Metalcatto
Pupil Slicer has probably the most agonizing name a band could have. There’s no way I read it without blinking just so I can protect my eyes from the images those words evoke. Blossom was a disruptive album that really challenged my definition of loudness and noise, but it left such a lasting impression that when I got the promo for Fleshwork, I knew this job had to be done immediately. I’m a sucker for any Metal that claims to deconstruct something and mix it with some good social commentary, so let’s dive in!
Metalcatto
When you’re a band like Paradise Lost, one that redefined a subgenre and balanced its deep emotional side with relative commercial success, it’s hard to surprise the world. And yet, the band has managed to do that time and time again. I honestly can’t remember the last time it released anything below a 3.5/5 in my book. Ascension has the impossible task of proving that the band still has the resilience and creativity to deliver top-quality Doom Metal. For once, I have faith in these guys—and can you blame me?
Vicky
If you’re reading this, it means you’re probably either very curious to find out who Cradle of Filth are, or you’re here to eventually correct me, stating things such as: “you are not trve enough.” Before we dig into the (sort of traumatizing) history of the Cradle, I think it would be alright for me to let you know how I, your laid-back Symphonic Metal fan, first started listening to them. It was a warm summer day, in 2025… No, let’s take it from scratch.
Metalcatto
Adur is walking a thin line for me. No, it hasn’t done anything wrong, and it hasn’t made awful music either. But it’s offering Post-Metal that deeply resembles Amenra and Cult of Luna—two bands I absolutely worship—which means We Fail to Love Ourselves has a tough battle ahead if it’s going to impress me. It’s not a competition, but comparisons are inevitable. And honestly, there aren’t many things I want more than a Post-Metal band that hits me hard in the feels instead of just giving me lounge Rock disguised as “atmospheric.” Let’s dive in.
Metalcatto
Sometimes you miss the decadence of urban life—the filth that makes you feel alienated, and yet, it’s the only home you know. Why am I starting this so seriously? Where are all the jokes? You see, when Trudger came to us with Void Quest, I quickly realized this band shares members with Dvne (one of my top Prog albums of 2024). The promise was that this would be even darker and heavier, so obviously, I’m more excited than a drunkard in a liquor store (stop it! Get some help!). So let’s go!
Ixone
Oh good lord, what have I even gotten myself into? One bizarre mention of influences and I’m on a cruise down the river Styx… absolutely brilliant! The Medea Project have come forward and delivered what I can only describe as an absolute Doom Metal oddball; a fascinating one, yes, but an oddball nevertheless. Crushing, eerie and disjointed are only a few of the myriad of adjectives that come to mind when listening to Kharon (the river Styx mention wasn’t actually pointless), brought forth by both the music and the adjacent elements, such as the stunning cover artwork. That being said, I shall leave the introduction as it is and actually do what I am supposed to.
Metalcatto
It’s been a while since I reviewed a band I had absolutely no idea about going in. Ba’al didn’t arrive with a wave of hype or drama. It just had solid artwork — and sometimes, that’s all you need to get curious minds clicking. Humans are, after all, visual creatures. But you’re here to find out whether The Fine Line Between Heaven and Here is worth your time and money, or if it’s dragging us straight into sonic hell. Big questions, I know — but let’s see if we can wrangle some answers out of this beast.
Vicky
You’ve probably heard about Alestorm before. As a long-time fan of these pirate Metal titans, I had to listen the moment I heard they were about to release a new album. Your average Alestorm listener knows the band has evolved from a Running Wild-esque Heavy/Power Metal act with lyrics about pirates, alcohol, and battles to a more Power Metal-oriented sound—while keeping the same lyrical themes. Over time, the band has embraced humor too (who can forget the deluxe edition of 2017’s No Grave But the Sea, which included “dog versions” of all the songs?). That’s why one wouldn’t be too wrong in saying Alestorm is to Running Wild what NanowaR of Steel is to Rhapsody of Fire: initially a parody that eventually gained worldwide recognition and became a cult favorite.
Metal Eclipse Reviews 